LIZZIE ESAU’S NEWEST SINGLE ‘Bugs’ FINDS BEAUTY IN THE CHAOS

Photo Credit: Storm Hudspith-Walker

Released on the 2^nd of May, Lizzie Esau’s latest single, Bugs, offers a compelling exploration of the delicate balance between creativity and self-destruction. Bugs showcases a blend of grungy, indie-rock intertwined with profound and poetic lyricism, which has become so synonymous with Esau as an artist. 

Bugs illustrates Esau’s musical talents. The composition intricately weaves together melodic elements, instrumentation, and vocal delivery, to create a musically engaging and emotionally resonant listening experience.  Layered guitar riffs and subtle synths create a dark and moody atmospheric backdrop, borrowing elements from the grunge sub-genre, yet it also takes on an anthemic quality, effectively echoing the emotional weight of the lyrics. Esau’s vocal delivery carries a raw honesty that feels intimate and relatable, drawing listeners into her world, as the melody stands out and is hauntingly beautiful. 

Lyrically, the track delves into the complex relationship between artistic inspiration and personal turmoil. Esau uses the metaphor that ‘[Her] downfall is [her] muse’. We normally would not associate a person’s ‘downfall’, a moment when one is at their lowest or most vulnerable, as a source of inspiration, however, Esau challenges this, referring to these moments as her ‘muse’. There is an implication that Esau uses her personal failures, challenges or hardships, as fuel for creativity. There is resilience in reclaiming moments that seem too far gone to be saved, transforming pain into powerful inspiration. 

Despite exploring the necessity of self-destruction for the purpose of reconstruction, Bugs does not aim to romanticise the maladaptive relationship between pain and ingenuity. Esau, instead, presents a candid and raw perspective of dealing with internal turmoil as she ‘would choose to stay just as I am’ in fear that emotional healing may dampen her creative spark. Throughout the track, there is an overwhelming sense of self-awareness in Esau’s lyrics. Vulnerability is an essential part of the songwriting process, embracing moments of fragility and confronting them head-on. She acknowledges the strife between understanding the importance of emotional healing versus the intrinsic desire to spiral and push boundaries, taking on the role of an ‘apologist’, offering an argument in defence of this controversial viewpoint. 

Esau highlights the paradox of finding comfort in discomfort. She skilfully immerses the listener in a raw, chaotic inner world where anxiety, self-doubt, and emotional unrest are not just acknowledged, but embraced. The song’s jagged instrumentation and visceral lyrics reflect a psyche in turmoil, yet there’s a strange sense of familiarity – almost relief – in returning to this mental state. Through the somewhat grotesque metaphor of a ‘head full of bugs’, Esau vividly portrays the intrusive thoughts and mental clutter that often accompany the creative process, seeming to suggest that the chaos, while painful, is also creatively fertile and oddly grounding. Though her ‘stomach is in knots’, she’ll continue to engage in these self-destructive habits because they create a space where she feels most alive, inspired, or even understood. It’s a place where discomfort isn’t just endured, but needed – ‘I’m no fun unless I’ve drank / so that’s just what I’ll do’

Esau’s ability to articulate feelings that many find difficult to express, especially in an era where mental health conversations are becoming more prominent, allows the song to serve as a reminder of the importance of emotional expression. Bugs stands as a testament to Esau’s ability to transform personal struggles into compelling art, showcasing her talent for tackling complex emotions without oversimplifying them.

Bugs by Lizzie Esau is out now everywhere.

Unless otherwise stated, Photography & Text Copyright 2025 © Laura Amelia/ADRENALINE Magazine.